As Jedi who seek to use the Force is a Light way – we must be wary of the negativity that permeates our communities, culture, nation and world. Cynicism can give you wings –in that it allows you to soar above your difficulties on a vapor of discontent –however it ultimately takes away the sky. The Force is what sustains a Jedi – an impartial current of unlimited power and grace- and there is nothing it cannot do, and no hole it can’t fill in our lives. Any challenge we have represents a Force sized, Force shaped hole that only the Force can fill.
All Jedi live lives of spiritual warfare. I have come to the conclusion that there is no help or sanctuary to be found in my consciousness- if my consciousness are my thoughts, fantasies, daydreams random thoughts and impressions – I must rely on the Force and in relying on the Force acknowledge that it is my brain that is not so much interested in my serenity as it is in my survival from saber tooth tigers. This cyclical lizard brain is my birthright as a human being – and wants me in a state of conflict. To expect reason from millions of years of fight or flight evolution is foolhearty –I take refuge in the Force –which is beyond fight and flight. If I can see beyond my pride, by making mini Gods out of stature, vengeance, sex and success and it’s present necessity in my life, if I can forsake the illusion of permanence- of wanting to possess instead of allowing to unfold, if I can keep a sense of humor about myself, if I can be thankful that as a Jedi I am never alone and If I have a balanced answer to the question “what would I do if I loved myself” –I can claim some success on my path to becoming one with the Force.
In my room is a chair that I call the chair of pain. It is the chair I sit in when I find out the woman of my dreams has other ideas and has taken up with my close friend. It is the chair I sit in when someone I love decides to hang herself. It is the chair I sit in when I must make a decision that is going to effect someone negatively. It is the chair where I feel the hard emotions. The unforgiving ones. The chair where I grapple with my mortality. On my current path of sobriety – it is my throne where I ascend chapel perilous and take back my power through the crucible of life’s pain. I am told by my master that when one takes the pain of life and loss and does so by embracing life on life’s terms –that one goes up in vibration – literally transforms the worst that life can throw at you into mana from heaven. I believe this is very true- it is part of the mystery school –that is the path of the spiritual seeker and Jedi. As Light Jedi we are called to feel every emotion with absolute purity as all emotions are action signals from the will of the Force.
When we become worthy of the title Jedi – we are men and women who have assumed complete responsibility for our destinies. We disavow the false powers of fear and anger- we cultivate the true power of being completely comfortable in our own skin – of being able to acknowledge what it is that truly weakens us. It is that pile of laundry, it is the phone call that I need to make but have not, it is the tire rotation that I keep putting off, it is the incompletion of the minute tasks –that reminds me that even the greatest hero may die of a thousand tiny cuts- and a call to action in that we as Jedi gain the strength of the temptation that we resist! Those with true power never need to exercise it!
The chair of pain teaches me that my purpose is to make my life a game worth playing. It teaches me what is truth –for if there is every something that I lack the energy for – it is not something I should be involved in – for when we do what we love –it energizes us! If I am in a situation where I have to pay the bills – I do the next small right thing – secure in the knowledge that the Force is guiding me – for with a clear and instrument –I can feel the Force more than I could in the past – and with each small task I perform – my power increases for it is no longer being dissipated through the psychological maintenance of self pity, fear, anger, self seeking motives and despair. I forgive everyone for everything without exception! I have total willingness to serve the Force and serve humanity!